Chipwitch Today!

The Sun

The Sun is in Cancer

The Sun is at 28 Can 16' 09", and is 152015200km away and approaching.

The Moon

The Moon is in Virgo

The Moon is at 06 Vir 28' 03", and is 405906km away and approaching.

Moon Is In Virgo

Hello, star gazers and celestial enthusiasts! Our dear friend, the Moon, has decided to park itself in Virgo for a cosmic sleepover! Now, before you start envisioning the Moon with a microscopic dustpan and brush tidying up after the stars (because, let's face it, Virgo is the zodiac's neat freak), let's delve a little deeper into what this really means. The Moon being in Virgo is like a cosmic librarian organising the universe's grandest bookshelf. The world suddenly seems to be in high definition, and every detail is magnified. Don't be surprised if you find yourself alphabetising your spice rack or colour coding your sock drawer. And for those of you who don't normally entertain such activities, don't fret! You may just find yourself appreciating the beauty in the details instead...or, you know, actually finding your keys for once! But here's the fun fact, my dear cosmic voyagers, the Moon is currently sitting pretty at a whopping 405,951.244287664km away. That's a lot of zeros! But don't worry, it's not planning on moving in permanently, nor is it going to send you a bill for long-distance calls. Remember, this phase is all about embracing the small stuff. So, go forth, enjoy the details, organise your life, and maybe throw a little lunar party in honour of our Virgo-visiting moon. Just remember to keep the noise down; the Moon's got a lot of reading to do! And if you're wondering about tomorrow's horoscope, tune in again. As long as the Moon hasn't decided to join a space circus and become a lunar acrobat, we should be good to go. Until then, keep your telescopes primed and your minds open, space cadets!

Mercury

Mercury is in Leo

Mercury is prograde at 18 Leo 16' 54", moving at 1.65 degrees per day, and is 175346264km away and approaching.

Mercury Is In Leo

Mercury in Leo: A Cosmic Comedy Sketch

Alright, folks! Grab your popcorn and take your seats because the cosmic theater is about to put on a show that could make even the most stoic Capricorn chuckle. Yes, my stargazing friends, Mercury - the zippy planet of communication - is doing its fiery tango with expressive Leo. Expect some Shakespearean drama, minus the tragedy and double the comedy.

No more tiptoeing around the tulips. It's time to say it like you mean it, but remember, Mercury in Leo is like a caffeine-charged chatterbox at a party. Your words could come whizzing out faster than a SpaceX rocket, so make sure your brain is on board before your mouth starts the countdown.

Mercury in Leo turns all of us into stand-up comedians. Leo, the laughing lion of the zodiac, loves a good joke and an appreciative audience. So, be prepared for lots of puns, dad jokes, and maybe even a harmless prank or two. Just remember - laughter is contagious, so spread it around like Leo would spread its mane in the wind.

Speaking of manes, get ready to strut your stuff like a confident Leo on the catwalk of life. Got a speech to make? A presentation you've been dreading? Now's the time to channel your inner Beyoncé and own the stage. Remember, the world is a stage, and we're just improvising our lines here.

Mercury in Leo is like a cosmic muse for creativity. It's time to dust off those old paintbrushes, unearth the camera hidden in your closet, and let your imagination run as wild as a Leo in the savannah. Who knows? You might just create your own masterpiece during this transit!

So buckle up, space cadets! Mercury in Leo is sure to be a memorable ride. It's less of a quiet stroll through a museum and more like a rollercoaster through a theme park filled with stand-up comics. Enjoy the laughter, speak your mind, unleash your creativity, and remember - in the grand cosmic comedy, we're all just trying to find our punchline.

Venus

Venus is in Leo

Venus is prograde at 28 Leo 32' 28", moving at 0.07 degrees per day, and is 54110418km away and approaching.

Venus Is In Leo

Venus in Leo: Big Bang Theory meets Hollywood

Hold on to your telescope folks, because Venus has just swaggered into Leo like Sheldon Cooper at a Star Trek convention. Yes, that's right, the planet of love and beauty is now in the constellation of the mighty Lion, and things are about to get a little dramatic in your universe.

Now, when Venus finds itself in Leo, it's like the sun just got a bit hotter. Expect grand displays of affection that can rival the big bang itself and emotions as explosive as a supernova. We're not talking about shy, secretive love here. Oh no, we're going full George Lucas, Star Wars epic saga of romance.

But remember, amidst the fiery declarations of love, Leo also has a knack for drama. So, don't be surprised if a mild disagreement escalates into an intergalactic battle worthy of a spot in the next Marvel movie. Just remember, even the Hulk knew how to calm down and transform back to Bruce Banner. So, let's all take a deep breath, shall we?

And let's not forget about money when Venus is in Leo. Think of it as the currency in your personal sci-fi saga. While you might be tempted to splurge on that limited edition Spock figurine or the latest VR tech, remember that Leo also values generosity. So, why not use your funds to bring joy to others? Maybe buy matching "I believe" alien shirts for your friends or donate to a charity working towards real-life Martian colonization. Trust me, the universe will thank you.

So, buckle up my celestial enthusiasts. Venus in Leo is here to remind us that life is too short for monotone. It's time to embrace our inner nerdy hippie, and remember, the truth (and love) is out there.

Mars

Mars is in Virgo

Mars is prograde at 06 Vir 35' 31", moving at 0.62 degrees per day, and is 347837397km away and receding.

Mars Is In Virgo

Well, well, well, gather round my star-gazing friends! You might want to buckle up your seat belts (or should I say, harness your rockets?) because Mars, our beloved cosmic cousin, has packed its bags and made a pit stop in none other than... Virgo! Now, if you're looking at me with as much confusion as a Trekkie at a Star Wars convention, fear not! Let me break it down for you. You see, Mars is the planet of action. It's the Arnold Schwarzenegger of the zodiac, if you will. It's all about getting things done. On the other hand, Virgo is the Hermione Granger of star signs. It’s meticulous, efficient, and has a knack for cutting through the fluff. So when Mars catches a train to Virgo town, what we've got here is a cosmic productivity machine. Think of it as upgrading your computer from Windows 95 to the latest macOS. Everything runs smoother, faster, and your old bad habits, like procrastinating on that big project or eating one too many donuts, are suddenly under the microscope. But, ah, every silver lining has a cloud, doesn't it? With Virgo's perfectionism and Mars' fiery temperament, this planetary combo can be a bit like having Gordon Ramsay in your kitchen. There might be a few "constructive criticisms" flying around, and self-doubt may creep in like an unwanted houseguest. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither were you. So give yourself a break, alright? Instead of nitpicking over every tiny detail, channel this energy into something productive. Balance your budget (yes, even those pesky receipts you've been avoiding), plan for the future, or perhaps learn a new skill. Ever wanted to try knitting? Or coding? Now's the time! In short, Mars in Virgo is basically the universe's way of giving us a cosmic kick in the pants to get our act together. So let's roll up our sleeves, put on our thinking caps, and show the universe what we're made of!

Jupiter

Jupiter is in Taurus

Jupiter is prograde at 12 Tau 24' 09", moving at 0.13 degrees per day, and is 764402189km away and approaching.

Jupiter Is In Taurus

Jupiter In Taurus - The Bull Meets the Gas Giant

Brace your socks off, because Jupiter, the planet of wisdom and my personal favorite giant, has checked into Hotel Taurus. Now, Taurus, we love you for your stubbornness and your love for all things plush and comfortable, but this cosmic tango is about to shake things up a bit. No worries though, as we all know, chaos is a friend of mine.

Think of this as the universe's reminder that you don't have to look outside for wisdom – it's been chilling in your spiritual living room this whole time! Much like that lost TV remote, it’s always in the last place you look. So, push aside those daily distractions and tap into that wisdom like a maple tree in syrup season.

Speaking of tapping, Jupiter in Taurus is like the ultimate life coach, yelling "You can do it!" from the sidelines. It's time to make those long-term dream lists and start checking them off like a fervent Black Friday shopper. With Jupiter's growth spurt energy and Taurus’ headstrong traits, we're all set to trust the process and reach for the stars, or at least, the next available gas giant.

Now, let me let you on a little secret – Jupiter is your good luck charm and Taurus is your cash cow. Combine these two and it's like hitting a cosmic jackpot! So, check your financials, invest in that startup you've been eyeing, or finally buy that lottery ticket. Who knows? You might just get lucky!

But remember, dear reader - Taurus loves indulgence. And Jupiter, well, let's just say it doesn't exactly advocate for self-control. So, while it's great to dream big and chase after the green, let's not go overboard and mistake our needs for our wants. In other words, don't turn a shopping spree into a galactic conquest. As I always say, patience is not just a virtue, it's a survival skill.

So here's to Jupiter in Taurus: A time of wisdom, growth, prosperity, and a mild warning against overindulgence. Remember to keep your feet on the ground, even when you're reaching for the stars. Or in this case, Jupiter.

Saturn

Saturn is in Pisces

Saturn is retrograde at 06 Pis 19' 24", moving backwards at 0.05 degrees per day, and is 1340861414km away and approaching.

Saturn Is In Pisces

Saturn in Pisces: The Nerdy, Cosmic Roommate

Alright, folks, grab your cosmic teacups because Saturn is crashing the Pisces party and things are about to get real... or surreal. You know, Piscean stuff. Picture Saturn as that nerdy, meticulous roommate who always insists on measuring out exactly 1340914869.515702009km of toilet paper. He's currently in retrograde, which means he's even more intense about those space measurements. Fun, right?

Now, don't panic, but this celestial sleepover may feel a tad intrusive. Imagine you're knee-deep in a dream about opening a unicorn-themed coffee shop and in walks Saturn with a clipboard, asking about your business plan. It's annoying, sure, but remember, Saturn is just trying to help. He's like the universe's dad, barging in on your daydreams, vacuuming up all the stardust you've been gathering. And I hate to admit it, but his advice could be more helpful than a thousand shooting stars.

Oh, and there's a catch! With all this mental gymnastics taking place in Pisces' dreamy realm, you might experience some serious cosmic insomnia. But hey, every cloud (or nebula) has a silver lining. This is the perfect excuse for some good old-fashioned self-care! Meditate with your favorite crystals, take a moonlit stroll through the woods, or just catch an extra forty winks. Just don't forget to keep a dream journal by your bed. Who knows, Saturn might just drop in to give you some million-dollar advice!

So, while Saturn's stay in Pisces might feel a little like having a surprise audit from the cosmic tax department, remember: it's all part of the journey. Besides, who knows, you might just end up with a unicorn-themed coffee shop out of it!

Uranus

Uranus is in Taurus

Uranus is prograde at 22 Tau 27' 37", moving at 0.03 degrees per day, and is 2996995440km away and approaching.

Uranus Is In Taurus

Greetings Earthlings and Stargazers, it's your friendly and laugh-inducing astrologer here, ready to drop a cosmic bombshell on you. Now don't panic, we're not talking about actual explosions in the galaxy. I mean, space is already pretty much a never-ending firework show, isn't it? Alright, brace yourselves: Uranus is in Taurus. Yes, you heard me right! Our buddy Uranus, who's just a casual 2,997,066,056.276844501km away (I mean, who's counting, right?), has decided to do a little dance with Taurus. And let's be honest, this isn't exactly a match made in celestial heaven, folks. Imagine Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory trying to dance with a bull. That's basically what's going on up there. Taurus, our reliable, stick-in-the-mud sign, likes things steady and predictable. But here comes Uranus, the cosmic equivalent of a caffeinated squirrel, bringing sudden changes and shaking things up. "But wait," you say, "I don't like change!" Well, newsflash my dear stargazers, change doesn't care. It's like that one cousin at family reunions who insists on showing everyone their belly button lint collection: unwelcome but inevitable. Now, the Taurus sign has a bit of a reputation for being a moneybags. So, with Uranus in Taurus, expect some serious changes in the world of finance. We're talking revolutionary, game-changing stuff. Banks may go extinct, new forms of currency might pop up (bitcoin, anyone?), and the stock market might just do a somersault. On a personal level, this celestial shake-up is all about freeing ourselves from financial chains. Debts, taxes, credit card interests, rent, mortgages – Uranus is looking at these with a cosmic sledgehammer in hand. To sum it up, the next seven years are about breaking free, embracing change and redefining our relationship with money and materialism. So buckle up, buttercups. Resistance is futile. Instead, let's approach this cosmic rollercoaster ride with an open mind, because, at the end of the day, we might just find ourselves in a better place. After all, isn't change the only constant in the universe?

Neptune

Neptune is in Pisces

Neptune is retrograde at 27 Pis 34' 35", moving backwards at 0.01 degrees per day, and is 4394640196km away and approaching.

Neptune Is In Pisces

Well, hello there all you celestial voyagers! I've got some stellar news for you. Neptune, the cosmic hipster of our solar system, has decided to crash at Pisces' pad for a while. Now, Neptune is usually the type to drift along, a bit distant and aloof, but when it gets cozy with Pisces, it's like a quantum physics conference colliding with a Woodstock revival. Neptune in Pisces is like getting a PhD in emotional intelligence. It's your chance to dive deep into the cosmic ocean of feelings, to do the breaststroke through the nebulae of nostalgia, or even to doggy paddle in the galactic gulf of empathy. It's all about embracing that big ol' universe inside each one of us and realizing we're all made of stardust, man. So let's talk about what this means for you. First off, drop the small stuff. Seriously, it's like trying to count the stars in the Milky Way while missing out on the whole cosmic show. Look at the big picture and embrace the universal flow. Secondly, think about what you can bring to this cosmic potluck. Maybe you've got a killer recipe for peace or a secret ingredient for kindness. Use this time to discover and cultivate your unique gifts. And lastly, don't be shy about sharing your discoveries. Neptune in Pisces is like having your own intergalactic megaphone to broadcast your spiritual journey. Remember though, no spamming the cosmic radio waves, okay? We're all here for the same ride around the sun. So whether you're a seasoned star-gazer or more of an armchair astronaut, take this time to tune in, turn on and beam out. And remember, the universe doesn't make mistakes, only happy little accidents. So, go with the flow and let your inner light shine. After all, we're all just wanderers, navigating by the stars.

Pluto

Pluto is in Capricorn

Pluto is retrograde at 29 Cap 08' 51", moving backwards at 0.02 degrees per day, and is 5056026733km away and receding.

Pluto Is In Capricorn

Pluto In Capricorn: The Ultimate Galactic Power Move

Alright stargazers, let's talk about the celestial bigwig that is Pluto. It's now in Capricorn, which is like a cosmic version of when Sheldon and Leonard from The Big Bang Theory decide to share an apartment. You know, two powerful forces sharing the same space, bound to create either some groundbreaking discoveries or a series of hilarious misunderstandings.

So, Pluto is currently 5056025094.274333000km away (give or take a few billion kilometers... space GPS hasn't exactly been invented yet). Oh, and it's also retrograde, which in astrological terms, is akin to your computer deciding to update right in the middle of your favorite Netflix show. Annoying? Yes. World-ending? No.

Now, Pluto and Capricorn are both kind of like those overachieving friends we all have who make us look bad at parties. They're focused, they're driven, and they're not above stepping on a few toes to get their way. So, if you find yourself suddenly unable to tolerate anything less than perfection, well, blame it on the stars. Just remember, being a star doesn't give you license to be a supernova-sized jerk.

Pluto, in its quest to be the ultimate life coach, wants us to toss out those negative patterns that aren't working for us anymore. It's like Marie Kondo, but for your soul. If it doesn't spark joy, thank it for its service and gently let it go into a black hole. And yes, this process may involve a bit of constructive destruction. Like, say, tearing down your Lego Death Star to build a more efficient Lego Millennium Falcon. Aim for balance in your destruction and creation, folks! Remember, a balanced universe is a happy universe.

The Sun

Sun Trine Neptune

Today will be rewarding if you find the time to express yourself by helping others. Find something artistic through which you can channel your creativity and your soul. Art and music as well as spiritual pursuits are favored today. Try to become one with the Universe today. Creative visualization can be an important means through which your goals are realized. Idealism runs high today.There is an unmistakably dreamy, inspired, and sensitive side to those born with easy aspects between the Sun and Neptune. A marked appreciation for music and the arts is present. The connection of Neptune with the Sun, which represents the ego and the will, certainly softens some of the hard edges that might be found elsewhere in the chart, adding a sensitive and spiritual dimension to the personality. These people are naturally compassionate, especially those born under the trine. It is so completely natural for them to accept that there is more to the world than what is before their eyes, that they tend to presume everyone must be spiritually-inclined. Of course, they come to realize that this is not the case at some early point in their lives. Their attraction to spirituality and metaphysical subjects is usually marked. These aspects favor writers, artists, and musicians. These people are sensitive to those who are suffering, although they are not as easily taken advantage of as those with Sun-Moon challenging aspects. They are humanitarian and often have a special connection with animals. If other aspects and positions in the chart support it, these people are not ones to dominate others or assert themselves to the point of brashness.Some Famous People with Sun in Easy Aspect to Neptune: Sextiles – Mick Jagger; Trines – Farrah Fawcett, Billy Corgan, Muhammad Ali

The Sun

Sun Opposite Pluto

Power struggles may be likely today. You may encounter others who try to force their will on you or others who resent feeling as if you are forcing your ego on them. Try to compromise and find a balance. Transformation can come about if you are open to change and if you can keep your ego from becoming all-encompassing. Today may be an intense day. Control your arrogance and your domineering attitudes. Be reasonable.People born under a challenging aspect between the Sun and Pluto are prone to inner tension and negative, self-destructive behavior. When things are going well, they suffer from fears that something will come along to change that. Their thought patterns can be negative, and if not kept in check, they can seriously undermine their happiness. Constantly worrying that the rug will be pulled from under their feet can easily become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Sun-Pluto have tremendous power and strength–when they learn to accept and use that strength, instead of fear it, they are some of the most effective, insightful, helpful, and healing people around!One of the most prominent characteristics of these aspects is the tendency to be intensely dissatisfied with their personal accomplishments and expressions of self. These people put a lot of pressure on themselves regarding their own endeavors. A child, for example, with a challenging Sun-Pluto aspect may work hard at a piece of artwork, decide it’s not right, destroy it, and start all over again. This same child will be especially disturbed if they feel people are watching as they create their artwork. This is a simple example, but it’s quite descriptive of the tendency for these people to be dissatisfied with their creative self-expressions, and to want to hide their expressions from others until they feel the output is “right”. This is largely due to a perceived inability to express or reveal their true personalities to others. They experience a simultaneous urge to express themselves and to hide themselves. They struggle with a deep need to control themselves and life itself. Rarely are Sun-Pluto people completely satisfied with themselves. They are especially sensitive to criticism, and feel the need to “redo” themselves often. There is a marked fear of losing control, and this might stem from some traumatic event in childhood, or the childhood might have been crisis-ridden or emotionally-charged in general. As such, these people are often intensely fearful of, or threatened by, change. This can express itself through attempts to control their lives such that they can manage their fears of being taken off guard. Of course, this generally backfires!Another characteristic of these aspects is an intense need for privacy. They fear being exposed or invaded. Again, this is an expression of their dissatisfaction with the self they are projecting, and they are generally uncomfortable with their evolving ego. They seem to undergo many identity crises, and they feel the need to control what others know about them and think about them. Their fear of exposing themselves might cause them problems with others, who may begin to mistrust them, presuming that if they are so protective of their privacy, they must have something sinister to hide. The truth is, they struggle with a dissatisfaction with themselves and their fear of being exposed is really about a fear of being vulnerable, as well as a manifestation of their own identity crisis.These people are quick to read between the lines. They need to be careful, however, to avoid reading negative or dark things into situations or people. They need to know that if their tendency is to hunt for dark “truths” rather than unbiased truths, this is a self-destructive behavior that stems from fear. Many people with these aspects are overly attached to things, habits, people, and their past. At the root of this is an intense fear of change that would threaten to make them vulnerable. Still, Pluto’s goal is to transform through change. Inevitably, Sun-Pluto people will have to face their fear of change and accept that they need change in order to grow.We all have a dark, irrational side, but people with Sun-Pluto in hard aspect are forced to confront it and integrate it into their personalities. It can be a challenging process, especially because the Sun rules all that is “light” – the rational, conscious mind. The Sun is noble and righteous by nature. Aligned with Pluto, it can have a hard time accepting the darker, intense, and often irrational Pluto energies into one cohesive whole. This is the challenge that Sun-Pluto face. If these people find themselves using manipulative tactics to get their way, or attempting to control others through subversive tactics, it is a clear cue that they are mishandling Pluto energies. It is a powerful indication that their self-image is low. There is little satisfaction derived from getting our way through manipulation. It only serves to make us feel less effective in the long run and on a personal level. If I were to win a favor by using subversive tactics, what will it prove to me? It will reinforce my feeling that I am not effective just by being myself. And, effectiveness is something Sun-Pluto craves.Especially with the opposition, these people might attract manipulative, possessive, or jealous people into their lives. With the square, there is more of a tendency to attract dangerous or upsetting situations in the life. Either way, these people need to get in touch with the reason why they are attracting these people and situations. In all likelihood, they are not handling their own fears effectively, and they feel they are not in control of their lives, and a looping pattern is thereby created. They eventually come to realize that they are very strong people with enormous resilience. They need to identify with, face, and accept their “dark” side. Self-acceptance is the key to handling this aspect. Channeling Pluto energy into constructive channels is also important.Famous people with Sun in hard aspect to Pluto: Squares – Wynonna Judd (Sun square Saturn, Uranus, and Pluto), Jamie Lee Curtis, Sally Field; Oppositions – Muhammad Ali, Robert Duvall, John Travolta, Elvis Presley, Steve Allen, John Hurt, James Earl Jones; Oppositions – Nicole Brown Simpson, R.D. Laing, Maya Angelou, Jeffrey Archer, Brooke Shields, Margaret Thatcher, Steffi Graf, Barbra Streisand, Farrah Fawcett.

Mars

Mars Opposite Saturn

You may feel rather restrained and too disciplined by others at this time. You may feel purposely held back from doing the things you want to do. This can cause great frustration and great annoyance. Please try to make the best of it and do not try to get even with them or try to get back at them. The repercussions will only boomerang back to you. If others do not appreciate you at this time, just realize that it is best if you continue working hard, doing the best you can until this combination of energies passes. This can be a stressful aspect but do not fret and let it get to you and upset your health. Guard against falls, bumps and bruises. Wait this aspect out and your energies and freedom to do the things you desire will return. In the meantime, work hard and stay optimistic. Express your frustrations in a cool, calm manner. Don't keep everything inside.You are a perfectionist. You can pick at yourself and others unmercifully, trying to get circumstances in your life to match some unspecified standard. Your energy becomes freer to work in an unencumbered way when you recognize that you aren’t really looking to match an objective standard at all. What you want is to find some emotionally and psychologically defendable ground to stand on. The real trick in life for you is to keep moving. This is not easy since you should really only move ahead on a project after forethought or planning; your judgments tend to be colored by your fears or your momentary desires. You work very hard for what comes to you. This is unavoidable. But, you could end up working very hard for no gain. This is avoidable through balancing your drives with your responsibilities. You find that you have better health and much freer energy if you get vigorous physical exercise at least three times a week. — Interpretation sample from the In Depth report.Mars square Saturn or Mars opposition Saturn: *You work hard and patiently to achieve your objectives, persevering and continuing on in spite of difficulties and discouragement. Concentrating on a single, clearly defined goal, you are able to accomplish much, but you often feel that the way is long and arduous, and that you must struggle on alone, that it’s all on your shoulders.You are capable of great self-control and self-denial and can be a hard task master, expecting far too much of yourself. You also tend to hold yourself back, to doubt your own power and ability. You feel that you meet with great resistance whenever you try to assert yourself or take initiative. Anger and frustration can be big problems for you, especially when you try to work with other people or depend too much on others for support. You work best in solitude.#Your involvement with other people often focuses on the harshest side of human experience. You become aware of destructive energies around you and learn to overcome these difficulties. Your spiritual life can become the source of nearly inexhaustible energy. You face tests through separation.Some Famous People with the Mars in Hard Aspect to Saturn: Squares – Susan Sarandon, Claudia Schiffer, River Phoenix, Phil Hartman, Julius Caesar; Oppositions – Sheena Easton, Farrah Fawcett, Brooke Shields, Darryl Hannah, George Clooney, Todd Bridges, Jean-Claude Van Damme.