Chipwitch Today!

The Sun

The Sun is in Cancer

The Sun is at 15 Can 52' 00", and is 152092671km away and approaching.

The Moon

The Moon is in Pisces

The Moon will change from Pisces to Aries in the next 24 hours.

The Moon is at 22 Pis 19' 18", and is 368072km away and receding.

Moon Is In Pisces

Good news, star gazers! The Moon is currently chilling out in Pisces, a whopping 367,843.179334692 kilometers away. Now, you might be wondering, "What does that mean for me, oh wise sage of the stars?" Well, let me break it down for you. Just like that group of hippies you see drumming in the park, the Moon in Pisces is all about embracing the spiritual and emotional side of things. It's like our cosmic friend up there has taken a deep dive into a celestial sea of emotions, intuition, and creativity. So, if you find yourself tearing up at a commercial for coffee filters or suddenly inspired to write the next 'War and Peace,' don't fret. It's just the lunar vibes doing their thing. But don't get too comfortable in your emo phase. In the next 24 hours, our moon buddy is going to do a cosmic hop, skip, and a jump right into Aries. Going from Pisces to Aries is like swapping your avocado toast for a jalapeño pepper. It's fiery, it's bold, and it's not afraid to take charge. So strap in, folks, because things are about to heat up. And remember, whether you're feeling more like a moonstruck Pisces or a ready-to-rock Aries, it's all just part of the cosmic rollercoaster. Soak it up, laugh it off, and don't forget to tip your astrologer! Moon dust doesn't pay for itself, you know.

Mercury

Mercury is in Cancer

Mercury is prograde at 24 Can 08' 57", moving at 2.05 degrees per day, and is 195800586km away and approaching.

Mercury Is In Cancer

Greetings, star gazers and cosmic enthusiasts! Do you feel that little tug on your heartstrings? That's not your ex texting you at 2 am. Nope, it's our little speedy friend, Mercury, doing a cha-cha slide right into Cancer's dance floor, some 195 million kilometers away from us! Now, don't get all crabby just because the planet of communication is bunking up with our crustacean zodiac member. Instead, think of it as a celestial sleepover where everyone's sharing their deepest, darkest secrets and there's popcorn involved. Mercury in Cancer isn't about sending you into an emotional tailspin, oh no! It's more like Mercury wrapping you in a warm grandma's-knitted-blanket of intuitive understanding. You’ll start processing things on a level deeper than that one philosophical conversation you had after three cups of coffee (or wine, we don't judge). Rather than simply blurting out "I love you" text messages to your Uber driver (we've all been there), you'll find yourself expressing affection with a gentler touch, maybe even using full sentences instead of emojis! This is the time when your gut feelings graduate from a community college and enter the Ivy league of intuition. Mercury's usual logic doesn't disappear, it's just wearing a different pair of glasses, ones that allow you to read between the lines and understand the hidden chapters of life’s novel. Ever hear that saying about us humans being terrible listeners? Well, Mercury in Cancer is here to give us a crash course in listening 101. It's less about 'waiting for your turn to speak', and more about lending an ear to understand. So go ahead, embrace this transit. Let the silence speak volumes and remember, real listening is done with the heart (and the ears of course, don't forget those!). After all, Mercury isn't in Cancer forever, make the most of this cosmic heart-to-heart while it lasts!

Venus

Venus is in Leo

Venus is prograde at 24 Leo 49' 59", moving at 0.47 degrees per day, and is 66632343km away and approaching.

Venus Is In Leo

Intergalactic Love Affair: Venus in Leo

All right star-gazers, grab your love antennas and prepare for cosmic fireworks! Venus, the celestial goddess of love, is waltzing into Leo's cosmic dance floor, which is about as subtle as a supernova in a library. Picture a cosmic diva in a sequin jumpsuit belting out love ballads on karaoke night. That's what we're dealing with here.

During this time, you may feel like shouting your love from the rooftops, or maybe even from Mars. Leo is a Fire sign, and we're not just talking campfire here, we're talking full-on rocket launch. Expect your dates to be as playful as a two-year-old Martian on a sugar rush, declarations of love louder than the sound of a black hole devouring a solar system, and perhaps a few green-eyed alien tantrums.

With Venus in Leo, it's not enough to merely be liked, as if you're some sort of mediocre dwarf planet. No, we demand to be adored, like the shimmering ringed beauty that is Saturn. This is the time to take interstellar risks and make grand cosmic gestures. Those who choose to play it safe might end up feeling lonelier than Pluto.

Of course, love isn't exactly a calm spacewalk while Venus is in Leo. Leo has a flair for drama that rivals any soap opera set in a galaxy far, far away. If you feel like you're being ignored, you might be tempted to release your inner Wookiee. Remember, in the grand scheme of the universe, there is no 'I' in 'We', but there is an 'Us' in 'Universe'!

When it comes to spending your space credits, Leo sees money as a way to show off your cosmic bling. It's all about making yourself and your loved ones feel like you've just won the intergalactic lottery. But remember, splurging on a new spaceship is fun, but true joy lies in gifting others with thoughtful presents, like a piece of the moon or a pet asteroid.

So buckle up, space cadets! Venus in Leo is a time as colorful as a nebula and packed with enough energy to fuel a warp drive. So let your love light shine brighter than a quasar and remember, a life devoid of fun and excitement is like a

Mars

Mars is in Leo

Mars is prograde at 28 Leo 39' 03", moving at 0.61 degrees per day, and is 337196239km away and receding.

Mars Is In Leo

When Mars in Leo it is

In the galaxy far, far away, Mars has parked its spaceship in Leo’s neighborhood, hmmmm. Noticing, you must, that life without joy is as exciting as a lightsaber without its glow, it is. All work and no frolicking under the twin suns of Tatooine, dull Padawans it makes. Encouraged you are, to seek not just the positive moments, but to carve out some fun time in your busy podracing schedule, you must.

During this celestial soiree, a time to follow your heart it is. Rule the heart, Leo does, and his lively passion is celebrated during this galactic gathering. Emulate the courage of a Jedi and pursue what sets your soul ablaze like a Death Star. Few are the chances outside of Mars in Leo to reach such levels of creativity and eagerness, hence cherish this opportunity, you should!

However, beware of the dark side. Overconfidence can lead to trouble, it can. Thinking we deserve the rewards without doing the work, or respect without giving it, a path to the dark side it is. Stellar performer, Leo is, but mere acting is not enough. If admiration you seek, admirable you must be. If leadership you desire, lead you must. If respect you want, respectable you must be.

While Mars visits Leo, contagious enthusiasm is, but so is intergalactic drama. Craving more attention during this transit, we do, and offended we feel when we don’t get it. Because Leo is the sign of expression, idle we won't sit. Roar we must to express our feelings, leading to possible explosive situations as volatile as thermal detonators.

Learn you must, while Mars moves through Leo, that the ego can be both a beautiful creation and a disastrous Sith Lord. Proud we feel when our egos are nourished, but hurt when they are wounded or ignored. This cosmic conjunction offers you a chance to reflect on what ego means to you, and balance it like a Force user balancing the light and dark sides. May the Force be with you, always!

Jupiter

Jupiter is in Taurus

Jupiter is prograde at 10 Tau 29' 44", moving at 0.16 degrees per day, and is 792260220km away and approaching.

Jupiter Is In Taurus

Right, smegheads, listen up! Jupiter's decided to pop over to Taurus for a bit of a cosmic chinwag. Now, I know what you're thinking - "Lister, I've got bigger fish to fry than celestial alignments. I've got laundry piling up and my cat's started doing interpretive dance." Bear with me, this is important stuff! You see, Jupiter is the big boss of wisdom, like a professor who's had one too many energy drinks. He's all about making us think deep thoughts, usually about whether we left the gas on. But he's currently hanging out in Taurus, and Taurus is the zodiac’s most chill sign - so laid back it's practically horizontal. So, when Prof. Jupiter meets Mr. Cool Taurus, it's a bit like that one time I tried to teach Kryten to play poker. At first, it's all confusion and chaos, but then something clicks. It's like they're saying, "Hey, you've got all the answers already, mate! You just need to shut off 'Hollyoaks' for a minute and listen to yourself." Jupiter in Taurus is like being given a cosmic to-do list, only instead of 'buy milk', it's 'achieve your dreams'. So, start checking off those goals, one by one, and before you know it, you'll have built that spaceship out of beer cans or finally mastered the art of indoor gardening without killing every plant in sight. Jupiter's also the lucky charm of the cosmos, and Taurus is all about the moolah. So if you're feeling like a skint student after a night out, this could be your ticket to the financial big time. But remember, Taurus also loves the good life, perhaps a bit too much. So, while you're enjoying your cosmic payday, don't go splashing cash on diamond encrusted pizza cutters or gold plated socks. Keep it cool, keep it Taurus. In short, folks, with Jupiter in Taurus, it's time to buckle up, stick on your favourite tunes, and enjoy the journey. You're smarter than you think, richer than you believe, and every day's a chance to make your dreams come true. So, go out there, and knock 'em dead, space cowboys!

Saturn

Saturn is in Pisces

Saturn is retrograde at 06 Pis 52' 08", moving backwards at 0.03 degrees per day, and is 1363585436km away and approaching.

Saturn Is In Pisces

Galactic Guidance: Saturn In Pisces

Alright, space cadets! It's time to buckle up your star cruiser and put on your cosmic thinking caps because Saturn has officially decided to go retrograde in Pisces, and boy, is it going to be a wild ride! Now I know what you're thinking - "What in the name of Carl Sagan's ghost does that mean?" Well, fear not my astrologically confused friends, I'm here to break it down for you.

First off, let's get our facts straight. Saturn is approximately 1.36 billion kilometers away (trust me, I checked with my trusty calculator, twice!). Despite this, when old man Saturn decides to do a U-turn and swim backward in Pisces' ocean, it affects us all. Think of it as the universe's quirky way of saying "time out!" Time to take a step back, grab a chai latte, and contemplate the meaning of life, or at least the meaning of that book you've been daydreaming about writing.

Now, Saturn in Pisces is no disco party. It's more like having your dad suddenly decide to join your college roommate group. Awkward? Yes. Intrusive? Absolutely. But it doesn't mean we can't learn something from this cosmic intrusion. So, throw out the "Keep Out!" sign from your door, and let's listen to what the universe's stern father figure has to say. His advice might be as helpful as finding the Big Dipper on a clear night!

One small warning: With Saturn's retrograde in Pisces, the realm of dreams and sleep, we might feel a bit like we've had too much coffee before bed. Restlessness, anxiety, even insomnia might creep in. So, it's a good time to brush up on your meditation skills, take long walks among the trees, breathe in, breathe out, and maybe take up napping - just make sure to keep a dream journal handy. You never know what wisdom might come floating down from the cosmos during this transit.

So remember, Saturn's retrograde in Pisces isn't just a chaotic cosmic event. It's an opportunity for growth, self-reflection, and maybe even finally starting that novel you've been daydreaming about. So embrace the chaos, laugh at the confusion, and always remember - the universe has a sense of humor too!

Uranus

Uranus is in Taurus

Uranus is prograde at 22 Tau 00' 12", moving at 0.04 degrees per day, and is 3025403399km away and approaching.

Uranus Is In Taurus

Uranus in Taurus: The Cosmic Shake-Up

Buckle up, star children, because Uranus is hanging out in Taurus, and things are about to get... interesting. Now, Taurus is a bit of a homebody, likes routine, enjoys a good Netflix binge, and really just wants to know where its next meal is coming from. And Uranus? Well, think of Uranus as that eccentric, unpredictable uncle who shows up unannounced, rearranges your furniture, and then takes off on his hoverboard. You see, Uranus is all about change, and Taurus... isn't.

But, hey, change can be good, right? Even if Taurus would rather keep things status quo, Uranus doesn't play by the rules. And let's face it, sometimes the old ways need a cosmic kick in the pants. This celestial shake-up might be a bit rough at first, but chances are, we'll find ourselves in a cozier, better place in the end.

Now, Taurus is a bit of a penny pincher and knows a thing or two about money, so with Uranus playing in its yard, we can expect some significant revamps in how we handle our finances. We're talking revolutionary movements in banking, housing, and stocks. And I'm not just talking about trading your Starbucks loyalty card for cryptocurrency, although that might not be too far off!

On a personal level, Uranus in Taurus is like a cosmic Marie Kondo urging us to declutter our financial and materialistic lives. Debt, taxes, mortgage - all these shackles that keep us from being truly free (and from affording those limited edition Star Wars action figures) need to be reevaluated. Uranus is in town to help us break free, and trust me, digging in our heels won't stop this cosmic tide.

So, let's embrace the chaos! The changes we make during this period could lead to greater stability, and who knows, maybe even a lifetime supply of cosmic peace. So as we ride this cosmic rollercoaster, remember: change is the only constant in the universe, even when it's 3025465840.188340664km away.

Neptune

Neptune is in Pisces

Neptune is retrograde at 27 Pis 40' 20", moving backwards at 0 degrees per day, and is 4424360982km away and approaching.

Neptune Is In Pisces

Greetings, cosmic comrades! So, Neptune is doing the backstroke in the celestial pool of Pisces, eh? That's like putting a philosopher in a room full of poets or like… Spock at a Star Trek convention. Talk about a mind-meld. Because Neptune is a whopping 4424424114.945092201km away (don't you dare ask me to convert that to miles), its influence feels as subtle as a butterfly landing on your nose. But, oh boy, it's there! Just like those pesky UFOs that the government keeps denying. This cosmic waltz between Neptune and Pisces is a bit like a Vulcan mind meld with Mother Earth. It's like we suddenly have HD emotional glasses on and everything becomes clear. You know, like when you finally understand the plot of 'Inception.' So, what's the takeaway from this space-time tango? Well, it’s time to brush off those cobwebs from your dreams, pull out your inner superhero cape, and get ready to contribute your unique gifts to the world. Yes, even if your gift is making the best darn tofu scramble this side of the Milky Way. And while you're at it, why not take a leap into the unknown? Maybe start that 'how to communicate with aliens' course you’ve been eyeing or build an altar for your Funko Pop! collection. Because, let's face it, if we're talking about sacred things, those little guys are right up there. Remember, Neptune in Pisces is like having Yoda as your personal life coach. It's reminding us that we're all interconnected - like a cosmic game of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. So, let's take this opportunity to come together, share our ideas, and make this world a better place. So, strap in, space cadets! We're in for a ride that's more thrilling than a trip through a wormhole. And remember, in the grand scheme of things, we're all just stardust living on a blue dot. Now isn't that a comforting thought?

Pluto

Pluto is in Capricorn

Pluto is retrograde at 29 Cap 27' 10", moving backwards at 0.02 degrees per day, and is 5058744349km away and approaching.

Pluto Is In Capricorn

Pluto In Capricorn: A Space-Time Conundrum

Picture this, humanoids! Our old mate Pluto, that icy-hearted maverick that can't decide if it's a planet or not (shout out to all those going through an identity crisis), is having a natter with no-nonsense Capricorn. Now, Pluto and Capricorn are like those two ambitious colleagues in your office who are always conjuring up masterplans around the water cooler. They're all about success, power, and getting things done yesterday.

But here's the spoiler... while these two cosmic powerhouses are plotting and scheming, they might forget there are other celestial bodies in this vast universe. So, during this astral transit, you might find yourself disregarding other people's views quicker than you can say "black hole". Let's try not to be space tyrants, shall we?

Now, our buddy Pluto is known for his love of spring cleaning the soul, pushing us to chuck out those negative patterns like last season's galaxy prints. But, and this is a big but, like a supernova-sized one... this involves some destruction. Not the end-of-the-world kind, mind you. More like controlled demolitions of those parts of our lives that have become as useful as a chocolate teapot.

So, grab your metaphysical hard hats and let's get to work. And remember, when you're busy creating your new universe, be as deliberate as a Time Lord with your choices. After all, we wouldn't want to accidentally exterminate anything important, would we?

Mercury

Mercury Sextile Uranus

Your thinking today is ingenious, original, clever, sharp, and magnetic. Electricity is in your head and probably the rest of your body. You are full of nervous energy, but it is the type that can help you accomplish more. New and exciting opportunities may come about today through travel, conversations with others, or through new reading material. Go exploring.You are open to new ideas, and come up with your own fair share of unique perspectives yourself. You have a technical bent and might take special interest in computers, technology, and science. Your intuition is very strong and mostly leads you in the right direction. You have a friendly, tolerant, and unprejudiced manner. You avoid making unfair judgments, being hypocritical, or stereotyping. You are very truthful and abhor modes of thinking that are biased and narrow. You are resourceful, witty, and quick to grasp and understand new subjects. Your thinking is often quite naturally outside of the box and very quick, and it can be baffling to you when you observe others who don’t get to the same conclusions as you in half the time. Still, you require much space and freedom to do your own thinking, and you don’t take kindly to anyone trying to force-feed you information or opinions. You are at your mental best and most cooperative when you have had the chance to find your own inspiration, and you easily feel hypocritical if you don’t–a feeling that doesn’t sit well with you one bit.The trine aspect is the more dynamic of the two harmonious aspects. Those with the sextile can call upon these traits when needed, and those with the trine between the Mercury and Uranus have incorporated the traits of the aspect into their personalities, expressing them naturally and consistently.Some Famous People with Mercury in Harmonious Aspect to Uranus: Sextiles – Lawrence Welk, John Steinbeck, Donald Sutherland, Erik Satie, Martin Sheen; Trines – Sheena Easton, Farrah Fawcett, Tracey Ullman, Marilyn Manson

Venus

Venus Conjunct Mars

There is a desire for love, beauty, relationships, and things that feel good. Desire is strong today and this includes the desire for the opposite sex. Be considerate of others today as you may express yourself too strongly. Use your creative energies and get involved with the arts, music or the theater. How about making a special meal for your significant other? Watch your spending today as you may feel tempted to overindulge and be too extravagant. Curb your potential for eating too much rich, sweet, or spicy food. Moderation is the key. Be refined and charming around women. Do not get involved in petty gossip or in competition with the women you know. Have fun at a social gathering, but remember, don't come on too strong or let your opinion of yourself swell so as to become overbearing and obnoxious.For people with a Venus-Mars conjunction in their natal charts, the blending of the feminine and masculine energies within is a natural process, although other aspects to the conjunction will tell the whole story as to how this is done. These people possess personal magnetism in spades. They live and breathe romantic/sexual relationships. It is generally easy for them to form relationships, unless the conjunction is severely afflicted. They ooze sexuality, and they are generally quite impulsive with regards to entering new relationships. Relationships are not only important to them, they require a fair amount of excitement, adventure, and passion in their pairings in order to feel alive and vital. With this conjunction, there is generally a pleasing blend of self-assertion and cooperation. This comprises some of their charm, in that they generally know how to assert themselves without stepping on others’ toes. In some cases, men with this aspect may be too dominating in romantic situations, and might gain a reputation for being “macho”. This is not always the case, however. For the most part, these people are quite direct about what they want in a relationship, and they are quite passionate when it comes to going about getting what they want. It can be a challenge maintaining perspective when it comes to relationships. These people are generally highly creative and are bent on finding outlets for their creativity. Their vitality and warm energy is something that can be felt by others, as if it lies just below the surface.Some Famous People with Venus conjunct Mars: Barry Bonds (in Gemini), Carmen Electra (in Gemini), Bette Davis, James Caan (in Taurus, also conjunct Uranus), Sally Field, Eva Gabor (in Pisces), Merv Griffin (in Leo), Kris Kristofferson (in Gemini), Bruce Lee (in Scorpio), Courtney Love (in Gemini), Peter O’Toole, Al Pacino (in Gemini), Stefanie Powers (in Scorpio), Sting, Uma Thurman (in Gemini), Vincent Van Gogh (in Pisces), Harry Hamlin (in Virgo), Sandra Bullock (in Gemini, conjunct the Ascendant).

Venus

Venus Square Uranus

Unstable romantic infatuations and impractical or irresponsible attitudes and conduct in relationships should be guarded against. There is a desire to break free from binding partnerships. Impulsive spending may be your idea of breaking free. Be careful during this transit because you are probably not thinking with your head, only your heart, which is your wild side right now. Your behavior now may be so bohemian or bizarre that people turn against you. Settle down and apply self-discipline.The need for stimulation and the need to break the rules with regards to love and romance is apparent when Venus squares or opposes Uranus in the natal chart. These people can confuse their partners readily with their on-again off-again energy when it comes to matters of the heart. With the opposition, this is especially pronounced–when they are given too much space, they feel unloved, yet when they get the love they seem to crave, they can feel smothered by it. They can alienate partners by adopting an “I don’t care what you do” stance when they feel threatened. The truth is, they do fear rejection like anyone else, but they don’t always want to admit it, and they can turn quite cold when they suspect their partner doesn’t care. The energy of Venus-Uranus in hard aspect is embodied in the expression, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”. When close to a loved one, they can eventually feel smothered or antsy if the relationship becomes too predictable. They can also detach themselves from living in the moment and enjoying the love they have. When apart, they feel more free to love. This aspect is common in the charts of people who maintain long-distance or otherwise erratic relationships. There can be abrupt beginnings and endings in relationships. They are not very “good” at endings–they can appear quite insensitive, aloof, and brusque. The “let’s be friends” attitude might hurt a partner who felt there was much more to the relationship. These people have a disdain for conventional, traditional, or otherwise “normal” relationships. They need to learn to balance their need for closeness and their need for freedom. They truly detest social pretenses, and insist on being sincere. Being well-liked takes second place to sincerity. There is a strong attraction to all that is different, and all that “shouldn’t” be done in love and in sex. Taste in clothing and art is unusual, original, and unique.There is a tendency to react spontaneously and intensely to others, and there is marked emotional impulsiveness with these aspects. Their most successful relationships are unconventional ones. Whether they do so publicly or privately, they delight in defying convention. They tend to move on and outgrow friendships. Some possess considerable romantic charm and humor, and they can pretty much charm the birds out of the trees when they choose to do so! Their love feelings are easily aroused and their romantic relationships begin with suddenness. There is a marked inner craving for emotional excitement and a need to feel spontaneous and free.Alternate interpretations:Venus square Uranus or Venus opposition Uranus: *Your love feelings are easily aroused and your romantic relationships begin with a sudden electric attraction, but they often end abruptly, and you may be in and out of love frequently – especially in your younger years. You crave emotional excitement and need to feel spontaneous and free, so you may avoid making firm personal commitments. Unusual or nontraditional forms of love and relationships appeal to you, and you are attracted to unique, creative, or unstable people.#You tend to fall in love instantly, and you need to discriminate between passing sexual fancy and something that can last “forever.” As your intuition develops, you will be able to identify the difference more clearly. When you “fall,” that is a good time to marshal all your respect for yourself and your partner, and to take things one day at a time until you have forged a deep connection. From Your Spiritual Path report.Some Famous People with the Venus in Hard Aspect to Uranus: Squares – Angelina Jolie, Diana Princess of Wales, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Corbin Bernsen, Naomi Campbell, Chevy Chase, Alice Cooper, Juliette Lewis, Anais Nin, Jean Piaget, Elvis Presley, Valerie Harper, Kirk Douglas, Johnny Depp, Barbara De Angelis, Kim Hunter, Tony Curtis, Carson Daly; Oppositions – Getrude Stein, Dionne Warwick, Sharon Stone, Carl Sandburg, Bonnie Raitt, Robert Pattinson, Deborah Kerr, Jack London, Jesse Jackson, Sean Connery, Ian Fleming, Ellen DeGeneres.